I was drunk when I first heard this one, but now that I'm sober and reading it, it cannot solely be Jewish propaganda.
Catalyst = Don Imus referring to a herd of nappy-headed hos who all got his ass fired for speaking the truth after Al Sharpton cried tears into what was directly underneath his unopened aspirin bottle because he started having night terrors of burning crosses in his front lawn after some rednecks in white bed sheets tormented his dreams. Well, this is what I suspect, anyway.
End Result = founder of Def Jam Records, Russell Simmons ordering every member of the rap community to refrain from using the words, "nigger" "ho" and "bitch" in their future rap ditties. Now I don't know about you, but this sudden epiphany raises a series of questions, primary one being how does this particular celebrity have the balls to make such a request after the business he's been in for the last 3 decades made him wealthy?
I uhh . . . hmm . . . yea, I don't even have a joke for that because I'm not that fucking funny. Seriously, Russell Simmons has openly stated this and I find my head doing loops because I can't think of something fun . . . wait. Yea . . . Something is coming to me, but I doubt it's politically correct.
How is one Black man going to tell 342 Negros how to speak into a microphone, much more so 86,834 other Negros who want to be rappers yet can't get to the recording studio because their parole hasn't come up yet?
Experts agree that Mr. Simmons' request is more bullheaded than Rosa Parks taking that front seat, not because of Black pride as originally suspected, but rather the corns on her feet hurt so badly she couldn't make it all the way in back. More importantly, Russell's request is an insult to the First Amendment (something Al Sharpton apparently needs a reference guide to help him comprehend.) Plus Snoop Dogg could never refrain from referring to a female as something besides a "bitch" "biznitch" "trick-tramp slut" "ho-ass bitch" "mark-ass trick" "bitch-ass trick" "bitch-trick slut" "ho-bag greasy ho" or "ass-poppin' trick nigga bitch foshizzle," and since Snoop Dogg dominates Mtv, he's really the one who matters, anyway.
Or is it the pioneers of rap music, Run DMC? Russell Simmons kind of died when 'Run' of Run DMC decided to go 'Rev (reverend) Run' coincidently shortly after he was accused of rape. Hmm . . . Ahh, yes, your suspicion grows much like mine, young Jedi.
"Do you!" is the title of Russell's new book; the release interestingly enough coincides with all the Don Imus controversy. I'm no expert on greed, but it would seem coming out and saying not to use those three words directly after the Imus thing would only propel the sales of his book, which sounds to me like 200+ pages of self-help advice for cohorts of mindless assholes, not to mention a senseless massacre to trees. I base this theory on the the front cover of the book announcing, "12 laws to access the power in you to achieve happiness and success."
Now, I haven't read the book, nor if I had one would I soak up his narcissistic bullshit because I would be far too inclined to use it for kindling. I just hope that with all this newfound wisdom there is a law or two in there of his entitled, "Don't shoot your guns in the club because it's straight wack," "Stop impregnating females before they get their temps," and "If marijuana is a gateway drug to narcotics, then prison should be a gateway penalty to lynching." There. Those are 3 of my 12 laws and I didn't even have to get 'em published for them to make sense. In addition, my laws would actually benefit society rather than telling people how to behave to achieve complacency in their shitty lives.
Fuck Russell Simmons because now he feels his life is coming to an end and wants to preach good behavior onto everyone . . . Wasn't a problem for rappers to use "nigger" "ho" or "bitch" when he was hungry for money, but now that he's got all the whirlpool jets shooting up his ass, it's a fucking issue. Asshole. Hypocritical cunt with a penis. Shame really. I liked Run DMC, Beastie Boys, 3rd Bass and most of Def Jam because it's what I grew up on . . . liked 'em 'til Simmons started maturing into a republican presidential candidate a month ago. It only took him, what . . . 25 years to realize what society-acceptable behavior should be like? How fucking convenient!
Ain't he just my goddamn hero . . . about as good of a protagonist as Flav in a reality show. It's okay, though. Everything I ever bought 'Def Jam' I've squared in mp3 format, given away, sold it, plus I wouldn't give a squirt of piss to catch Russell's eulogy on BET in February, coincidently one of the only months his followers would actually be able to see it considering the electricity can't legally be turned off. I mean, this prick telling the hip-hop community to stop using three certain curse words in their raps is exactly the same thing as Charles Manson telling Insane Clown Posse that knives and hatchets make for good weapons to kill people with, but to not make that information privy to the general public, i.e . . .
WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU TO BE TALKING?!?!
It's almost as if Russell Simmons is saying, "Well, yea, when I was a kid and I was in the shower and had to pee, I just did it in the tub because it's all going down the same drain anyay, but now that I'm all grown up and important, I tuck my sack in my crack then step out and go in the toilet so I can return to cleansing myself guilt-free."
Seriously. He has turned into the guy who gets out of the shower to take a piss.
